This last Saturday I sat down with Pastor Sok once again.I have felt for a very long time that God was preparing me to talk with him about his leadership style, but was waiting for the right time.I've never been eager to find the right time. Sok and I have talked about this before, but this time I believe God wanted me to address the issue more directly.No one else in the church has dared to hold Sok accountable because of their fear of him and for an Asian respect for authority.

I first spoke of our long-standing friendship, the good things he's done for me, and how much I have appreciated him.I then told him that I believed God wanted me to talk to him and warn him about a serious problem, which was that unlike earlier days, he was now leading the church less by the Spirit's power but by his own power, building a man's kingdom, not God's.I told him I even believed that God may remove him from his pastoral role if he did not make serious changes, humble himself, and seek God's methods again.I did not expect him to receive this well.Throughout the conversation I was able to stay calm and gentle, but no matter how gently such words are said, I don't know how my words could not seem offensive to him.I've long dreaded this conversation.

Pastor Sok put his finger right in my face and yelled I was a liar and void of God.He said I had no evidence.I presented as evidence that he constantly spoke harshly to the congregation week after week.If anyone asked a question he responded angrily and often accused them of rebelling against God.I said, "you are a teacher and pastor, and this behavior is not God's way."I told him everyone feared him greatly, and that I knew many non-Christians who wanted to attend church but would not because of his harshness.At first he denied this, but I persisted for he knows this is true.He then said all his preaching was from the Spirit and that's why it was harsh.If people did not like it, then they did not love God.

I argued that the church was not only for those who already loved God.I described how he used to be so interested in evangelism and discipleship, but now he not only showed no interest but even blocked it, focusing instead on absolute control of all aspects of the church.I pointed out that he refused to allow any church activity except at his home.I reminded him that recently there was a specific request by the two SS teachers and Christians in a distant village for him to personally visit or send teachers to teach children there, but he had rudely refused, and replied that if any child really loved God they would come to his house.Sok answered me that God had instructed him to minister only at his home, and if anyone in the villages really loved God, they know where to find him.I brought up the Great Commission and pointed out that the disciples, Paul, and Jesus all went out to share the Gospel, not waiting at their homes.

He repeated his divine instruction.I asked when and how he knew this was God's instruction.At first he was vague, but I persisted.Finally Sok said that God had made that mission clear to him in his heart when he first came to know God.I said I found that hard to believe.Years ago he had eagerly evangelized and started cell groups.

We talked about salvation.He said there were no believers in the church, only one percent believed God.I asked him if he believed he himself was saved.He answered "partly."How can it be "partly" I asked.He thinks it naive to think that one can be saved simply by trusting in the Cross.I think this explains a lot of his anger.Not understanding grace, he is yelling at everyone, maybe even himself, to believe harder and to stop sinning.

He expressed his anger with me for teaching my staff about God, and accused me of plotting to get rid him as pastor so I could take his place.I reached for him and said, "I'm telling you the truth.I do want to teach my staff but I have no desire to be a pastor or take your place."

Throughout the conversation he was angry, often extremely angry.Towards the end of our conversation, Sok made it quite clear he no longer wanted me to have anything to do with the church.He said nothing I had said had anything to do with God.I pleaded that he consider my words even for just a few days before concluding that.He replied, "I've decided already."

I grasped his hand and held it a long time, told him I loved him, then I went home.I mourned for a couple days, for our damaged friendship and for Pastor Sok.He's a very unhappy man.He is threatened precisely because he is afraid of losing "his" kingdom, yet his pride will not allow him to change.

After feeling exhausted by the tension of events for the last 3 weeks, I am now feeling relaxed for the first time in several weeks.I am not sure what to do next, if anything, but feel things are increasingly in God's hands. Deb is inclined towards me going to Sok again, this time with witnesses, and then some sort of public statement.I am not so sure.I'm focusing on preparing my teaching sessions for my staff.I think that's what they need most now - a clear understanding of who God is and his Word.Plus there is plenty of medical and agricultural work that's been neglected.

I've learned that Sok's Sunday sermon this week was largely devoted to denouncing a false teacher, and then denouncing anyone attending my teaching sessions as being against God.I had a teaching session today and two more staff dropped out.I suspect Sok will increasingly shift his harsh judgment to our staff and anyone else he considers disloyal to him.Please pray for our staff and many other vulnerable members of the church.They are going to be taking a lot of heat and may feel pretty confused.Pray for Sok's family who are caught in this predicament.They also fear Sok.Tough days lie ahead for the church.

Please also pray for Mr. Bot, the assistant pastor.He came to see me two days ago.The good news is that I believe he is gaining a true grasp of the good news of the cross and grace!Hooray!Pray for him to be strong in this new freedom.Mr. Bot is a very kind and gracious man, and while he clearly feels Sok is way out of line, he also fears Sok and has not held him accountable.He is usually well liked but has lost credibility in the church this last year because of his silence.I believe that Bot may have to speak out soon or risk many people falling away.I prayed with him, asking God to keep him kind and humble, but also to help him understand God's word and be bold for the truth.

Thanks again for all your prayers!We cannot say thank you enough.

John Coats